Posted by LTPA Staff | Posted in Real Hodges, TMZ | Posted on 08-31-2009
Chubby Spikey sports last Thursday’s black T while refusing to admit what his paymaster is guzzling down each morning.
TMZ’s often underrated and always overweight Chubby Spikey fielded some questions in a wide angle live stream just moments ago. In the broadcast’s strange and desperate last moments, the sweaty beast went to great lengths assuring viewers that Toolmaster Harvey Levin is not drunk during morning meetings. Levin’s overly dramatic reactions to things like celebrities eating sandwiches and walking to their cars seem to have made viewers suspicious about what’s in his sippy cup. According to Chub Spike, the contents of Harvey’s secret sauce cocktail may be revealed next season. … Sadly, this comment hints that there may be another “season” of TMZ on the way after this one. Damn.
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Posted by LTPA Staff | Posted in Letters | Posted on 08-28-2009
Today we received this heartfelt letter from a girl who calls herself “italianbitch20.” She gets a bit worked up if TMZ’s biggest Hodges MAX HODGES is being made fun of.
italianbitch20,
OMG, thanx for writing to us! It was totally awesome to get your note…
laterz!
-LTPA
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On August 25th, 2009, TMZ’s biggest Hodges MAX HODGES presented a gripping tale of a celebrity wearing a t-shirt. The investigation left almost no stone unturned as Hodges recited three fourths of the writing on the shirt, “lies lies lies,” opting to leave out the fourth and arguably most critical word, “lies.” It remains unclear who actually read the shirt to Hodges, but not-so-secret-admirer Curly Squeaky is suspected to be the Bernstein to Max’s Woodward.
Note the graphic handgun on Hodges’ t-shirt pointing at the peaceful and unsuspecting Droop.
In an almost unbelievable chain of coincidences,
Max Hodges wore a
t-shirt during his report on this celebrity’s
t-shirt. Even more erie is the fact that
Hodges’ t-shirt featured a
gun seemingly pointed at Droop Doggy Dog, who ALSO was wearing a
t-shirt… and get this: Droop Doggy Dog’s
t-shirt featured a
peace sign! In the end, it seems
Hodges’ t-shirt investigation raised more questions than it answered.
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Hodges Report on Twitter
… better late than never. All you MAX HODGES fanatics who want more than our limited means have enabled us to provide lately, let the tweeting begin. Now that we’ve set up a Twitter account, it will be much easier to get you the Hodges news, information, speculation, and fabrication you need to know right when you need to know it! If the TMZ Superstar Sleuthmachine spends several minutes trying to understand the parking restrictions printed on a street sign only to eventually question a local store owner for answers, you’ll hear about it here:
http://www.twitter.com/HodgesReport
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Posted by LTPA Staff | Posted in Hodges Out and About | Posted on 08-10-2009
TMZ’s fan favorite celebrity news super sleuth MAX HODGES spent the weekend soul searching at Jokhang Temple in Lhasa, Tibet. An excerpt from Hodges’ bright pink diary of discovery reads “This place is killin’ … I can’t believe Brad Pitt got to live here for seven years. I wish I coulda filmed him walking to his car in these hills.” When granted an audience with His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama, sources say Hodges continually steered the conversation, demanding “… but what would you do if you saw Susan Sarandon shopping for groceries?!” Without surfing, celebrity news, or surfing the web for celebrity news, Hodges found himself with more time than ever before to spend brushing his hair.
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